'The BOAC flight from Miami Beach was definitely a long haul. It was an overnight flight and i can never sleep sitting up, so, no bed for me the. Awful turbulence all of the way and I spent most of the flight with the sick bag on my lap, expecting to see breakfast again! What a dreadful experience.
'However, after a few year break, here I am in the USSR again. I'm such a lucky chap.
'Its been a long time since i was last here and, boy hasn't it changed. Even so, its good to be back in the place I belong. Too much to do, to many people to see. So I've decided to leave unpacking until tomorrow. The hotel receptionist, Honiy Vllemich, asked if I'd like a wake up call. After the flight I'd just had, I thought I could do with a lie-in and so suggested that Honiy simply disconnect the phone, frankly.
'I still can't believe that I'm actually back. Lucky, lucky, lucky bastard!
'Anyway, I met three very attractive young Soviet women at the airport. One was from Kiev, in the Ukraine. Unfortunately, as I was doing up my shoelace, she turned around rather too quickly and caught the side of my head with her enormous handbag. When I came too, she was very apologetic and helped me get up. How sweet. Then I had a cup of tea with a girl from Moscow. She insisted on taking me to a karaoke bar where we yelled out some Chuck Berry songs. As for the the woman from Georgia...I think I might have a bit of a fixation on her. But whenever she speaks to me, I start to stutter!
'We have been getting on well though. Her father owns a smallholding in the south, so I've asked is she could take me there sometime. I'd love to see those mountains topped with snow, that I've heard so much about. She is very talented and plays the balalaika. She saw that I was obviously getting a bit cold, what with the bang on the head and everything. So she put another bar of the electric fire on. How thoughtful.
'Anyway. I must go. I promised he guys I'd write a song while I'm here, but I just can't seem to find and inspiration!!
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